January Mama Message
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“You must be the change that you wish to see in the world."
- Gandhi
I return each year to my twelve basic essentials of parenting, with a slightly different lens each time. January’s focus is on self care, and I find myself reflecting on change in larger blocks of time. I understand that we tend to overestimate what we can accomplish in one year, but vastly underestimate what change can occur over ten years. Certainly in looking at the world situation right now, we want change to happen more quickly… but with a long view, we hope for the change that is necessary over the decade and beyond.
When we look at our own personal lives we can identify patterns that are happening over time. We see how we devote ourselves to our education, our relationships, our family, our career, our community… and hopefully we see where we need to focus on ourselves. In the cold and snowy weather of Montana in January there is a tendency to go inward and take the time for introspection. Right now I feel as if a bright winter light has been focused on my shortcomings and limitations. While I thrive on helping others and on being in community, I also tend to overdo things, then need time for renewal by myself, which limits my ability to help others… Striving for balance and trying to be a model for others, I am constantly reminded of the need for small daily steps.
Gandhi’s famous quote is so timely, and we can only help others after we have done our own work and are coming from a place of internal and external strength and calm. Whether we are looking at physical or emotional health, or at our own personal experience or the family dynamic, we still need to focus on our needs and growth first.
Mindfulness may be the single most important practice to affect our health and wellness. Learning to slow down, quiet the mind, and surrender to the flow instead of fighting the current is a daily journey (and challenge)! Introducing a practice of meditation can be one of the most powerful ways that we can foster positive change in our daily lives. It is one of the simplest methods of self care, yet also one of the most elusive. Our minds flit from thought to thought at a rapid pace, and trying to clear the mind takes daily intention. Starting with a simple five minute daily meditation can be that first change. It may take months, or even years, to achieve the transformation we strive for, but the important thing is taking that first step. When we commit to a practice of mindfulness, we are putting our own needs first. Yet we are also opening to the divine inspiration that may steer us to our ultimate life purpose.
Using essential oils during meditation can assist in focus as well as opening us to this inspiration. Coriander is the oil of integrity with oneself, and can be particularly helpful to the person who tends to serve others while neglecting their own needs. Let’s focus on ourselves first as we enter this new decade, yet stay open to the wisdom that can inspire and propel us to a more positive future!
Maria