December Mama Message
“"Time, as far as my father was concerned,
was a gift you gave to other people."
- Michelle Obama
In December it is natural to focus on giving… of items, of thoughtfulness, of time, of sharing memories. We strive to be filled with gratitude and generosity… This year there are so many extreme situations. Families are separated from each other, loved ones are hospitalized or gone, disagreements between family members and friends are escalating, and many wonder how they will pay the rent or mortgage, much less provide a joyful holiday season. This year has affected us all in different ways, but I don’t think anyone has been
untouched by the challenges!
I’ve had many discussions of favorite holiday memories with families and friends lately, and I haven’t heard one person talk about an inanimate material gift that they remember. Some examples of these shared memories are… the smell of woodsmoke in the air, the feeling of excitement on Christmas morning, the lighting of the Hanukkah candles, the special holiday treats during the festival of lights, singing together as a family, the decorating of the Christmas tree, the time together at the holiday table, the shared recipes and preparations together, the walking of the Advent spiral, going to midnight Mass as a family, making luminarias to line the walkways, Solstice bonfires, hilarious holiday cards received, making handmade gifts for others, special holiday music, walks with family… The list goes on, and it is heartwarming to hear the stories! It inspires me to focus on the creation of memories like these. I want to spend time, creativity, and focused intention with others.
Recently I had a conversation with a good friend and mentor who was sharing how she was writing a card to her siblings to tell them how much they meant to her, and how they inspired her. What a beautiful gift! I think of the many years when my cards were just filled with our family’s photos and stories of adventures we had taken. How much more meaningful to share with my family and friends what they mean to me, and the many ways in which they have inspired me. I hope to do better in the future…!
This year has been one of helping us to see what truly matters in life. It has provided an opportunity to shift our priorities and slow down, to focus on each other and not material possessions. Health and happiness, time spent together, loving and compassionate care, holding hands, hugs, good food, long conversations, time in nature, music, deep listening, a shoulder to cry on, storytelling…
I would love to hear your stories of this year’s experiences. How are you coping, inspiring, loving, sharing, grieving, listening…? As we tell our own stories and listen to others, we clarify our family values and choices, and we gain insights and ideas for our family life. The stories weave us together in our shared humanity.
In the coming months I hope to continue to inspire and be inspired in community together. This holiday season may you make wonderful memories together with family and friends. As the days begin to lengthen and the light overcomes the darkness, may you find strength and courage to shine your own light brightly in our world!
Happy holidays!
Maria